I Had A Dream

I don't know, I guess that's a dream common to humanity, to find a deep and caring love. I may never be with anyone who is such in this lifetime. I have thought I met her many times but she has slipped away,leaving me alone, each one of them. Life itself is the unfoldment of perfection. My vision must be flawed because I am not satisfied. You are beautiful, a vision, fading, as I am. Freedom, real freedom is a crazy dream. Everything that one cherishes in this life seems to be another trap for "mara" to throw at one to kind of say "see how you are missing out on life" and watch us chase the bait. Watch us go through our head trips and heart trips...wanting. The yogic idea is to simply accept things that come our way, not to avoid those happinesses that come our way but not to chase them, and to face head on the suffering in our lives and to solve the underlying problem, which is a craving for pleasure that is actually just a reinforcement of our ego to our ego. This is something that kicks me around over and over again and when I think I get the point something new gets me chasing the bait again, ultimately to get clobbered again. I have given up on getting much in the way of compensation for the things I do. Sure I still want to live the "American Dream," get filthy rich, pin down a girl and raise a million brats. But life takes us where it wants us to go. Our only control is our awareness and control of our attitudes. It is enough to generate positive attitudes to our situatiins and gratitude at the possibility of change.