The Feeling of MIndfullness

We do a lot of things in our daily lives that limit our capacity to feel.  When we go inside of ourselves in meditation, we start feeling our blockages and as we drop the shields we use to wall off our feelings we start to feel again.  It isn't always pleasant.  But once we have acknowledged our feeling, then to that extent we come alive again.  This is not doing,  this is being done and getting on with it.  This is us not pretending we have such and such an attitude or self image, this is us feeling what we really feel like about our self image and what we are doing, and getting over it.

We all have our built in predilections representing the work that we have to do to free ourselves.  We might call it our "calling".  One wants to be a doctor, or a lawyer or a social worker or police man, what ever it is, it is our inner predilections calling us to do such and so.  But to grow from it we need to acknowledge what we feel like when we are living our professions or our recreations or our needs.   Who am I now and what am I feeling becomes the core of minfullness.  Mindfulness of being being aware of our body in our body,  how our body feels and how we are posturing ourselves in the physical sense and the feeling that we feel in our body, whether posturing, pain, strain or ease etc. .  Then also the body in the mind, how we look at ourselves, what our physical posture means to our self image.  Our emotions in our mind, how we feel ourselves as ourselves through such and so emotion.  And also our mind in our mind which is how we feel perceived as a being according to our image of ourselves.  There can be some dispute over whether these are accurately descriptive of the 4 Foundations of Mindfullness the Guatama put forth as a proposition and teaching.  This is how I remember them as being and what they mean to me.  Fundamentally, we are being aware of what we are, and how we are avoiding what is real.